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Bullying Behavior

More than half of the children between 9-13 years old are bullied, regarding a research by the NOS. And figures from a survey conducted by the CNV by Maurice de Hond show that more than a quarter of all workers suffer from bullying. There are probably more. Because we are often not aware that we exhibit bullying behavior, that we are bullied or we do not dare to admit it.

Bullying Behavior: This is how it can arise and why it is important to break out of this pattern

Unconsciously consciously, bullying is being projected to us while we grow up. Either during our upbringing or through our cultural conditioning. This has to do with one of the most important pillars in our country: ambition. And while having ambition doesn’t have to be wrong at all, it unfortunately still encourages competitive behavior: an “everyone for themselves” mentality. Which means that we live from the idea that there is not enough for everyone, also known as scarcity.

Bullying behavior is a coping mechanism

This already starts in primary school. Children realize very quickly that it is useful to be at the top of ‘the pyramid’. And that they have to show that they are strong and seem important. Children who choose to achieve this position by displaying bullying behavior have often copied this from their peers who mirror this behavior to them: parents, teachers, idols and other exemplary figures. Who – in turn – copied it from their peers.

A child does not come up this behavior all by himself. It can therefore be seen as copied behavior, or a coping mechanism: the way in which someone deals with problems and stress. This involves dealing with all kinds of constant stressors, such as in the case of bullying the fear of not belonging, not being good enough, etc. It has proven successful with their peers – or so it appears – and so they decide that it will also be an effective tactic for them.

From fear towards trust

This shows that we often think that we have to profile ourselves as a leader through abuse of power: by making others feel less than ourselves. Fortunately, however, this can also be done differently: by complimenting, supporting, motivating and collaborating with others. Because what you then create is leadership based on trust instead of fear. This creates more peace with other people and also with yourself. The universal law that there is enough for everyone is also being restored. Because why should only 1 person be at the top and being feared? It’s much more fun together with trust as the fundamental pilar!

Start believing in yourself

To transform this trend in our society, it is important that both men and women start tapping into their feminine traits. Because this is where our strength lies and that is precisely why these traits have always been rejected. Because when we become empowered, the people in positions of power who abuse this power will no longer be able to control us.

As long as we think we are less and that we need other people to guide us, so when we keep looking externally instead of internally for guidance, these people with power have free rein and can impose their will on us and push it through. Because haven’t we indicated that we think we can’t do it ourselves? That we ourselves are not strong and wise enough to behold that position?

We Are strong and wise enough. Only because of all the layers that have been “conditioned around us” by these same people with power, we no longer realize that. While beneath all those layers our own wisdom and creativity are still present, waiting for us to be discovered again. And with which we can very well create our own righteous world in collaboration with others.

Quit running away from who you truly are

We are just distracted by all the factors that have been designed to separate us from who we really are: shopping, sugar, booze, drugs, social media. All things that give us a temporary feeling of peace because they turn off all our feelings for a while. But when the alcohol wears off, your favorite show of the moment is over, or your sugar rush drops; your feelings come rushing back in to you as if they want to crush you. It feels like this because most of us haven’t learned how to go over their feelings and therefore rather choose to keep them under the carpet.

But when we don’t face our feelings, they become bigger and more anxious to us. By which we think that they are the enemy and that it is our life mission to stay away from our feelings as far as possible. But nothing is what it sems. Because the harder we run away from our feelings, the more unhappy we become. And, again, the easier we are to be controlled by the people in positions of power, gradually drawing us further away from who we truly are.

Free yourself from your copied behavior by feeling

And yes, I know, feeling your emotions can be scary. It can be scary because it opens up a world that you have been trying to escape all of your life. And you probably tried to replace it with one that accepted you and allowed you to be there. Entering this ‘forbidden world’ means that you can say goodbye to almost everything you feel comfortable with. You may recognize that what you have always thought of to be true, is no longer true for you. And this, exactly this, is terrifying.

Take this calculated risk

But just because it feels scary or awkward or off-limits doesn’t mean it is. You’ve only made yourself believe this all these years. And this was for a very good reason: it was safer to cover this part of yourself. To ensure that it would not be damaged any further, but that it would be preserved in its untouched and original state. So that, now that you are ready, she may shine through all the layers again, step by step. You may invite her to come out from behind the veils of your ego. To remind you of who you really are and what you came here on Earth for.

Live Your power

Step out of the herd
Set yourself free from people who use bullying behavior to get further in life
Break through the blockages it caused to you
Embrace your true self that lies beneath them
And become the Fearless Feminine you’ve always been
Be Fearless
Be YOU

* Photo by Rachel Coyne on Unsplash